Why?

I really don't know what The Lord is trying to show me. I understand why God answers my prayers selectively. I know God is preparing me for NS..

But what's up with this emotional roller coaster? It has been driving me crazy. I can't take this anymore. Soon my house will be at hougang chalet.. See me there... LOL!

But seriously, if this goes on, either I'll go crazy or I'll grow stronger with God. I'll pick the latter. I don't mind going though all these crazy emotions right now..

But I hope you friends, cell group members and strikeforce members will understand what I'm going through. I'm not in my best moods recently. I have been quite moody. When I don't get the results I want, I tend to get angry.

I'm really excited, depressed, furious & confused over this chain of events. Things is happening so fast right now. I have been doing so many crazy stuff this year that I even doubted myself.

But doubt alone is not a lack of faith. Thomas has lots of doubts, according to the Bible. But he made an effort to find an answer for that doubt; and move on.

I have no idea what will happen next. All I know is... I need to be more spiritual, hungry for the Lord now...

Prehaps this is the role of an armour bearer.

Why? I don't know. All I know that this year is going to be one of the most interesting chapter of my life yet!

The worst thing for me now is to die... So pray that I won't die in NS. But even if I do so... I'll shoot my CO first..